Excuses, excuses.

I just finished my 7C class. I have them every Tuesday and Thursday at 7:00, and I always look forward to it. This is a group of middle schoolers, and unlike many middle schoolers in Korea, these kids actually like to talk. They aren't quiet at all, which makes teaching them a blast. They're also extremely creative and funny, and always make me laugh.
On Tuesdays we follow the material from the book, but on Thursdays, we usually have a discussion based on current events or an interesting newspaper article. Today's homework was to finish the questions from last week's article, but no one had brought in the homework paper. It's typical for one or two students to forget, but not the whole class. However, these kids are so good all of the time that I couldn't bear to punish them. Instead, I seized a "teachable moment."
After playfully displaying my dismay that the whole class had failed to bring in the homework, I said "Well, you'll have to give me a creative excuse then." These kids are much too bright for the 'ole, "the dog ate my homework" line, and I knew some hilarious stories would ensue. I was right. And after seven terrific over-the-top excuses had been shared, I was doubled over and my stomach hurt from laughing. The kids got so into it that I believe they were trying to outdo each other. (I had them write their excuses down--to include writing in the lesson--but more for my own amusement!) Here's what they wrote:

Hyeon Gyeong
Last Saturday I went to beach with my homework paper. Because last Friday night I have a dream. In my dream my homework paper said, "Count me in--will go to beach. I really want to go to beach. Please." and tear. I'm very sad so I take it! On the sand I put off the paper and I went water. After 1 hour, suddenly my paper moving to water. I run and run...but sadly my paper wet...so I throw my paper in the water. Maybe my paper moving in the sea...

Ha Nee
A few days ago, the day is my brother's birthday. He ask me "please present!" so I think 'What is best present for him?' At that time, my brother said "I want your homework paper...please!! My wish!! This is very important for my lifetime!" So I am in agony. My homework paper is also important to me, but my brother is important, too. At that time, my brother said "If you give me the paper, I'll so delightful, maybe I'll can fly!! Please!!" Unavoidably, I gave my homework paper for my brother. I'm so sorry, Aubrey.

So Hee
Last Sunday I went my grandfather's house. I will do my homework in grandfather's house. But I lost homework in there. I'm very very sad but I don't find my homework. My grandfather said, "Will I send letter (mail the homework to you)?" But I don't like letter and said "No". My homework wanted (to stay) in the house!!

Young Sang
I went Amazon. I swam and played. Suddenly, strange sounds was heared. That was a crocodile! I was so scared. But I must do my homework. So I hold my homework and ran so fast. Crocodile ran fast too. I ran very very fast. When crocodile disappeared, my homework disappeared too. I was look for my homework but it didn't appeared so I was crying during to home.

Ka Eun
Yesterday, at 12 o'clock, I met a fairy, because I'm so kind and pretty. And a fairy ask to me "If you give me your homework, I will make a pumpkin car, and you can go to party." So I give my homework to fairy, and I went a party, and when I was dance, the prince came to me and said "You're so pretty, I love you, will you marry me?" So I was confused. So I ran away to my house, and left my grass (glass) shoes. Today, in the morning the prince called to me and said "I have your grass shoes. So, can you meet today? I will give your shoes." So I was allow, and after this class I have to meet prince in restaurant. I'm so busy now. Sorry Aubrey teacher :) I love you - ha, ha, ha...

Je Hyung
(Title: Yellow and Homework's LOVE)
There were yellow paper in my room. He was working for note. One midnight I was do my homework. At that time yellow paper was on my desk. When yellow paper saw homework paper then he loved in homework paper. They meated every night when I sleep, but one night I was wake up when they kissing. I was very angry because they must working for me only so I throw yellow paper in garbage. But it was my mistake my homework paper cry and call yellow paper. That night she cry so much and next night she give up everything because her love was disruption and all letter was erazing. But I can do nothing. I'm very sorry to homework paper and yellow paper. I hope my homework paper will chear up. When she chear up I can do my homework again. Let's pray for there love.

I like them all and it was hysterical to see each of the students concocting these tales before me, but this one was my favorite:

Jae Pil
Yesterday, I had a very surprising happen at 9 o'clock. The pencils and erasers had a war. The war was impossible war. Pencils couldn't killed erasers! Then my homework paper was said, "Don't fighting anymore". Pencils and erasers saw him and killed him!!! My homework paper had holes and scars. So he was died. I had a tomb for him.

Who do you think gave the best excuse?